I was originally going to write this week’s article about the craziness of May. I was going to try to be really funny. The chaos! The needing of a clone! The exhaustion!
The hard and wild of it all is absolutely true. I am overwhelmed. And I do want a clone. We all are and we all deserve an extra uber driver in our lives.
But in this last week some heavier things have entered our world that have made the wild of May a beautiful distraction. I welcome the light of the frenzy with open arms. I have refocused my perspective. Those kids that have to go to multiple places every night I am holding a little tighter.
Less than a week ago, the body of a fourteen-year-old girl that rides the same bus as my two older children who had been missing for a month was found. Ariana Funes-Diaz
had been brutally murdered. The details that have emerged are almost too intense to even fathom. She had been told to strip down and was beaten by a bat and a machete, all while someone recorded it on a cell phone. There was a 16, a 17 and a 14-year-old involved that will be charged as adults in the case. While the school did send out a notice to parents that Ariana had died with a crisis phone number, the school did not hold a moment of silence for her. It is probably for a number of reasons, more than I could most likely even begin to understand, but to know her or not, this is a horrific tragedy and her name deserves to be said and be heard so that families can hold their own spaces of grief and of silence.
In the last 24 hours a wonderful mother in the Southern community, Stacey Webster passed away. I recently hugged her at the elementary school mother-son date night and she told me that her cancer was back. They were doing everything that they could but most likely she had a few years left. Not weeks.
I scrolled through her Facebook photos last night. Selfies with her two kids. Pictures of them at Christmas. Pictures of her kids on stages, natural amazing performers. Really great memes. Pictures of Stacey ringing the bell at the cancer unit at the end of November signifying the end of her treatment. She was better. She was supposed to have more time.
She gave back. She volunteered. She loved her children fiercely. And about a year and a half ago she did something for me that I never fully thanked her for. I was going through a trying emotional and financial time and decided to sell my television. Stacey met me in a consignment shop parking lot, cash in hand. That $75 she gave me was how I bought groceries for my kids that week. I didn’t tell her how much I needed that money because there was a certain amount of shame that I didn’t want to bring to the surface. Sometimes the way we hold people a little tighter, a little longer, can say what the words can not.
Maybe that is the beauty of the silence. We can grieve and give the love and the hope and the gratitude to honor the gift of the life of someone else. Without judgement or spotlight. The light in us carries the light that was in them, wordless and every bit as powerful.
So in the chaos of the end of the year, please take the time for silence and the peace that it brings to a loud messy world. And let some laughter in too. The heavy and the light and the dance between are what keeps us all going.
Katie has a new book out that is a collection of quotes and mic drops to embrace your inner warrior. “Girl Power” is available now on Amazon and is the perfect gift for all the warriors in your world. You can find out more details and book signing info on her instagram @katieyackleymoore. Endless thanks for reading. Xo
Katie Yackley Moore is a freelance writer, real estate agent, yoga instructor and a momma of four navigating life and a separation and finding herself in the process. She adores coffee shops, laughing until it hurts and impromptu dance parties. Her work has appeared on Scary Mommy, Mamalode and HuffPost Parents. She has published a journal entitled “Dream a Bigger Dream” and the children’s books “You Are a Warrior” and “We are Family” and just finished her first novel. Catch up with her between tea breaks at The Naked Momma and on Facebook.