Dear Dr. Debbie,
How much crying in a day is normal? My little one is 5 weeks old and as much as 10 times a day she gets into a crying mode that will last about a half an hour. We rock her, pat her, swaddle her, walk her, sing to her and eventually it stops. Is this colic? This is my second baby, so maybe I didn’t know how good I had it with the first.
Her Mama
Don’t miss last week’s column Should kids have a limit on video games? — Good Parenting
Dear Mama,
Normal crying can be up to three hours in a day. Colicky crying has been described as incessant without apparent cause, for at least three days a week, and lasting for at least three weeks. This is the official definition first given to the disorder in 1954 by Dr. Morris Wessel and quoted on Medicine.Net. Onset is at about two to three weeks after birth. It peaks at 2 months and subsides by 3 ½ to 4 months. Much about colic is a mystery. Parents who were colicky themselves have a slight tendency to have a colicky baby.
Crying which is explainable, and therefore not colic, may be caused by digestive issues (allergy or sensitivity to an ingredient in the formula or to something a breastfeeding mom has eaten), or stress caused by a change in the daily routine or just too many new experiences to make sense of. Remedies can be explored by changing diets, or changing and sticking to a workable schedule. An overload of stress on the family can cause a baby to be irritable since she can pick up on the vocal tension expressed in arguments, the physical tension in how she is held, and the inconsistencies in behavior she relys on for developing a predictable daily routine.
Fussy babies may have a temperament trait of experiencing strong emotions (when they’re upset they’re really upset), or of being easily overstimulated by one or more senses (too much noise, too warm or too cold, etc.). Some people are just born grumpy (yes, it’s a temperament trait) in which case she just has to make a fuss but you don’t have to take it personally. Getting to know your baby takes a little time, but if her fussiness is due to an inherited temperament trait, the sooner you identify her challenges and help prevent her distress, the better for everyone.
The frustration for parents is that any or all of the above adds to the stress level of the whole family. Maybe you can take comfort in knowing that while one in four babies has some duration of colic, it goes away, and that all other causes of crying have a reason that a little detective work (along with pediatric consultation) can resolve.
In the meantime, continue to use the strategies you mentioned and a few more strategies depending on the suspected cause. I stumbled onto a remedy for my son’s crying by taking him outside one night. It was more out of my need for a breath of fresh air than anything, but he was instantly calmed. I thought maybe it was the peaceful night sky. It worked several more times until we began to suspect that the little guy had inherited allergies to dust and dog hair. Both were present in abundance in our home. This was scientifically confirmed at age 6 by the allergy specialist, but along the way, he learned there was a limit to his composure indoors with the exception of an indoor swimming pool. A run outside, or a dunk in the pool always relieved his agitation.
Try to use your friends and family for temporary respite from the crying. Surrounding your baby — and yourself — with the comfort of a supportive network is essential for good parenting.
Dr. Debbie
Deborah Wood is a child development specialist in Annapolis. She holds a doctorate in Human Development from the University of Maryland at College Park and is founding director of the Chesapeake Children’s Museum. Long time fans and new readers can find many of her “Understanding Children” columns archived on the Chesapeake Family Magazine website. You can find her online at drdebbiewood.com.
What do you think? Leave your thoughts in the comments or submit a question to Dr. Debbie at Betsy@jecoannapolis.com
