You’ve seen this formula before, most recently in “Think Like A Man,” the comedy that transformed comedian Steve Harvey’s self-help book into a big-screen success. That film used a bunch of different couples and overlapping storylines to convey Harvey’s lessons about life, love, and happiness, and “What to Expect When You’re Expecting” does something similar. With a number of different couples each experiencing some facet of pregnancy—one young woman becomes pregnant after a one-night stand, another after years of attempting to conceive with her husband, and so on—the film explores varying situations and mines them for laughs. But there are few to be had here; the characters are so thinly sketched and the scenes so predictable that little is really impactful. Reading Heidi Murkoff’s original book may actually be more exciting.
Set in Atlanta, “What to Expect When You’re Expecting” follows a number of couples or expecting parents. Jules (Cameron Diaz, of “Bad Teacher”) is a fitness expert and reality show host who is shocked to realize she’s expecting with Evan (Matthew Morrison), her dance partner on another reality show, and the news forces her to figure out how she can raise a baby and maintain her in-the-spotlight persona.
Photographer Holly (Jennifer Lopez) and her husband Alex (Rodrigo Santoro, of “There Be Dragons”) are planning to adopt a baby from Ethiopia, but Alex is beginning to worry that he’s not ready for the responsibility.
After two years of trying to become pregnant, lactation specialist Wendy (Elizabeth Banks, of “The Hunger Games”) is shocked but happy to learn she’s expecting with husband Gary (Ben Falcone, of “Bridesmaids”), but is thrown off-guard when Gary’s famous racecar driver father Ramsey (Dennis Quaid, of “Footloose” and “Soul Surfer”) announces his trophy wife Skyler (Brooklyn Decker, of this week’s “Battleship”) is pregnant, too. And she’s having twins.
Lastly, there’s also young Rosie (Anna Kendrick, of “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1” and “50/50”), who is amazed when her one night of passion with handsome enemy Marco (Chace Crawford) leaves her pregnant. However will they run their competing food trucks with a baby on the way?!
Nearly everyone in the film is shocked to learn they’re expecting, and that’s when some of the advice from the book comes in as the women and men try to shape their lives around the news. Jules tries to keep everything the same, figuring she can work the baby into her busy workout schedule. Wendy becomes overwhelmed by the perceived competition from Skyler, who is so young and beautiful. And Rosie can’t quite figure out her feelings toward Marco, meaning her thoughts about the baby are a little muddled, too.
Ah, so much melodrama! And it’s all piled on so high, with Gary and his father dealing with their father-son issues and Wendy flipping out in front of a big crowd and complaining about her third-trimester stress. And there’s also an omnipresent ick factor, with Jules throwing up on national TV and lots of talk about what ends up inside a baby’s diaper. All those unnecessary subplots and gross-out gags pad out a film that is improbably thin to begin with, and even though Rebel Wilson (of “Bridesmaids”) is ridiculously absurd as Wendy’s assistant Janice, her bizarreness is another wedge in a film that can’t find its rhythm.
Things only really gel when the film focuses on a group of dads who get together to walk their strollers and compare family horror stories, with the de facto leader being Chris Rock (of “Grown Ups”) as Vic. When Holly sends Alex to bond with the “dudes’ group” and prepare for life with a baby, Rock gets center stage to rail against parenthood, with lectures like, “Ready? There’s no such thing as ready. You just jump on a moving train, and die. … [Babies are where] happiness goes to die.” Backed up by other comedians like Rob Huebel of “The Descendants” and Thomas Lennon of “What’s Your Number?”, Rock certainly inspires the most laughs—but even his real-talk shtick can’t right the film’s other wrong moves.
And what’s worst is how the film can’t seem to find the right tone for serious emotional moments, like a difficult labor and traumatic miscarriage; they’re introduced but then rapidly dealt with. For a film that nears two hours, you would expect more serious stuff—but “What to Expect When You’re Expecting” insists on being a fluffy foray into cliché, and not even remotely real.
