Birthdays are a great way to celebrate your child. In addition to congratulating them on an age-related milestone, birthdays are also instrumental in helping children form lasting bonds with their peers. Memorable as they may be, it’s important to realize that birthdays look different for everyone. For some children, they involve loud music, colorful decorations, balloons and games with their friends and classmates. But for other children, especially those with disabilities, they may need to be adapted to meet specific needs. If you’re a parent of a child with an intellectual or developmental disability, navigating the execution of a successful birthday party might feel like an overwhelming process. But it’s not as daunting as it seems. Here are some ways to organize a supportive and successful birthday party for your neurodivergent child:
Start Small, But Strong
Golden Care Therapy, an Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) therapy provider, emphasizes the importance of a short and sweet gathering. When planning the guest list, it’s important to ensure that the people that you plan to invite are close to and familiar to your child. As opposed to feeling the need to bow to formality and return past invitations to be polite, keeping your child’s needs at the forefront must be your first priority. If your child takes time to open up and come out of their shell, it’s completely fine to keep the guest list limited — even among family members, inviting only those that your child has an especially close relationship with. It is also essential to recognize that children with autism, and other disabilities that affect sensory input, are prone to overstimulation, so being mindful of time and limiting the birthday to 60 to 90 minutes max is the way to go.
Be Mindful of Surroundings
For children with disabilities, the right surroundings are an integral part of having good experiences in daily life. The same can be said at birthday parties as well. Instead of a new and unfamiliar location, the Franklin Center, which offers comprehensive therapy and enrichment experiences for neurodiverse children to develop social skills and build connections, advises choosing a familiar setting such as your home for a child’s party, as this gives you more control over other factors such as decorations, treats, etc. If your child cannot have sweets or other types of foods at the party, being able to present party snacks in a fun and creative way can make a difference. Remember, if they’re presented well, celery sticks, carrots and other healthy treats can be just as interesting and fun to eat as more conventional birthday snacks.
Plan Your Party Favors
Party favors are part of the framework of a successful birthday party. However, when you’re planning a birthday party that caters to children of varying needs, it’s important to consider buying party favors that speak to everyone. It is also especially relevant to children with certain disabilities to ensure that the party favors that you buy are not overbearing in sound, light, color or smell and can offer a balanced experience for every child who engages with them. Some examples of appropriate yet fun party favors are customized noise-canceling headphones, bubble tubes or soft, color-changing LED lights.
Create a “Calm-Down” Corner
For neurodiverse children, parties can get more overwhelming than we realize. This is why it’s key to create a safe space, or a calm-down corner, that gives children the quick break they need in the middle of the party chaos. To decorate your calm-down corner, consider using comfort items such as blankets, fidget toys, noise-canceling headphones and colorful picture books. In addition to providing your child with the few minutes that they need to feel restored, a calm-down corner can prove to be an asset for any child (or adult) who needs a break as well.
Label Your Snacks
To reduce anxiety around unknown foods if your child (or another child at the party) has an allergy or food sensitivity, place the snacks that you plan for your child’s birthday party in transparent bowls with labels on them. As well as including the name of the snack, also make sure to write in the ingredients and ensure that the food is prepared in a safe, allergen-free environment. To add in a bit of fun, you could also plan the snacks around the theme of your child’s birthday party.
Need sensory-friendly activities for a party?
Find ideas like Toysmith Pin Art, Illuminated Gel Board and tactile sensory kits here:
annearundel.md.nocbeta.org/veterans/assistive/list.aspx?indexingterms=sensory-bin
AMC Theatres, Annapolis Music Therapy, Chuck E. Cheese in Glen Burnie, Rise for Autism and other venues and organizations throughout the region offer sensory-friendly activities via Autism Society Maryland.
Be Like Buddy also posts events and go-to places for sensory-friendly fun such as The Children’s Theatre of Annapolis and CRAB adaptive sailing, boating and fishing on the Chesapeake Bay:
Looking for allergy-safe food or desserts?
Here’s a list of Maryland eateries with dairy-free menu items, dairy-free labels or a list of top allergens with menu items, alphabetically by city:
godairyfree.org/dining-out/maryland-dairy-free-restaurants
Sweets’ Treats Bakeshop is a Pasadena-based dessert shop where every menu item can be customized for unique allergies and food sensitivities.
