I have a gold sparkly sign that hangs in my office with the word hustle in bright bold letters. A dear friend gave it to me and I look at it daily as a reminder to hustle and shine and repeat.
When I was a kid that played softball, I had a black and white poster of the Orioles outfielder Brady Anderson, shirtless and holding a baseball bat (as one does). It featured a lot of inspiring words on it and something along the lines of “If you want it, you can have it, hard work, sweat and desire.” Side note: I used to have a bit more time on my hands and I spent a lot of it looking at that poster. For the words, obviously.
The hustle, the hard work, the sweat and most of all desire to stand on my own have been my compass these last few years in going through a challenging divorce.
There is a space for that intensity and drive.
My therapist said something to me the other day that really made me pause and think (to be fair, just about everything she says to me makes me pause and think) but this resonated all the deeper. She said, “You need to practice more mercy and grace with yourself.”
First off, those words are just so beautiful, I wish we heard them used much more frequently in our daily hustle and grind.
Second off, she is right. And it is not just homework for me but for all of us.
There needs to be space for this too.
I listened to a real estate podcast where it seemed that the agents were bragging about how early they began their day. One guy said 4 am and the next boasted that it was rare for him to sleep past 3:30 am as if the 4 am guy was some type of slacker for sleeping for that extra 30 minutes. Why are we like this? I want to know a little less about what time you woke up in the morning and whether or not you are killing it and a little bit more about if you are happy. What is your story? Who do you love? How have you struggled and failed? How have you overcome? How do you practice mercy with yourself?
Yes. I love hearing about the hustle. I love being a part of the hustle. But how are we taking care of our mental health? That matters just as much. All work and no freedom to breathe can quickly lead to burning out. Self-care needs to be on our itineraries without any guilt or explanation. It is vital to refill our own cups too.
She asked what I was doing to really take care of myself, not the working out or working or running someone to practice or reading a few pages right before I fell asleep but what I was really doing to make space to refuel and I had to really think about it. “Book a massage,” she said. And I did. And it was glorious.
Your homework too this week/month/year/decade is to give yourself pause and to allow room for mercy and grace. You deserve it. And also, doctors’ orders.
Read more blogs by Katie Moore here.
Katie Yackley Moore is a freelance writer, real estate agent, yoga instructor and a momma of four navigating life and a separation and finding herself in the process. She adores coffee shops, laughing until it hurts and impromptu dance parties. Her work has appeared on Scary Mommy, Mamalode and HuffPost Parents. She has published a journal entitled “Dream a Bigger Dream” and the children’s books “You Are a Warrior” and “We are Family” and just finished her first novel. Catch up with her between tea breaks at The Naked Momma and on Facebook.