Dear Dr. Debbie,
My three-year-old has a habit of kicking the back of my seat when we’re in the car. I’ll ask her to stop and she’ll say, “Sorry, Mommy” then a few minutes later she’s doing it again. Otherwise she’s a very cooperative and compliant child. Is there something I’m missing about her need to do this?
Innocent Target
Dear I.T.,
It’s an interesting thing about three-year-olds. They’re building their leg bones. Your daughter isn’t trying to annoy you, but something inside her is compelling those feet to make forceful contact with the back of your seat.
The femur (thigh bone) is the longest and strongest bone in the body. Its main purpose is to hold the body up. The tibia (shin bone) is about 80% the size of the femur. From birth to age five a child’s legs must grow and strengthen to support crawling, cruising, walking, running, and jumping.
Weight Bearing Exercise
It is well-known among professionals and patients concerned about strengthening bones in older people that weight-bearing exercise can minimize the risk of fractures. Seniors are encouraged to work against gravity to stimulate bone health through walking, running, dancing, etc.
Young children’s bones also benefit from weight-bearing exercise. But we don’t usually need to encourage it! A three-year-old’s bones get a good workout whenever she jumps, runs, or kicks a ball. When her foot makes impact on the back of your seat, this puts firm pressure on the leg bones. This brings calcium deposits from her bloodstream into the bone cells at a time in her life when her legs are rapidly growing longer and stronger. The more calcium the better!
You may see a repeat of habitual weight-bearing movements in early adolescence – starting around age 11 for girls and 13 for boys – as the body undergoes another growth spurt including lengthening of the leg bones. Several sports are great for this – soccer, tennis, track, dance, etc. This may explain the occasional dramatic stomping of the feet or the daredevil jumping off of tall objects that may occur at this age.
Food for Bones
Physical exercise isn’t the only way to help growing bones get stronger. Go big on calcium rich foods such as dairy products, dark leafy vegetables (ex.: kale, collard greens), broccoli, tofu, chickpeas (garbanzo beans), lentils, and canned fish with bones (salmon and sardines). Look for calcium enriched breads, juices, and cereals, too.
Almonds are the best nuts for supplying calcium followed by hazelnuts and Brazil nuts. Sesame seeds are also a good source which suggests that humus – a mixture of garbanzo beans and sesame paste (tahini) might be something to try with the whole family.
Calcium works best in combination with Vitamin D, the sunshine vitamin. There was probably sufficient intake of Vitamin D when humans spent their waking hours, and some of their sleeping hours, absorbing sunlight through their skin. In our often indoors lifestyle, it’s important to assure adequate quantities for bone health through our diet.
Foods rich in Vitamin D include: fatty fish such as salmon, tuna, mackerel, sardines, herring, and trout; liver (from beef, chicken, and fish), mushrooms (button, portabella, and shiitake), eggs (chicken and duck), and certain varieties of cheese (Swiss, Fontina, Muenster and Monterey).
Jump for Fun
No guarantee, but it may be possible to reduce the amount of in-the-car kicking if you add some intentional leg pounding activities to your daughter’s day.
Be a frog – bend at the knees with hands on the floor in front of your feet and hop from “lily pad” to “lily pad” across the carpet (use your imagination, or lay yarn circles on the floor).
The floor is lava – spread couch cushions on the floor and leap between them.
Jump off a bottom step – this can be done repeatedly to your counting or to a song.
“The Grand Old Duke of York” – go up and down steps or just march in place.
Jump over lines – in the sidewalk, or in designs on the floor or carpet.
Jump over objects – back and forth over one plushie (or a sock) or lay a path of objects as
hurdles to jump over across the room or down a hallway.
Bubbles – you blow and she can stomp to pop them (best done outside).
Mini-trampoline – well supervised, of course.
Dance to the music – the livelier the better!
If this doesn’t stop the seat kicking, take comfort in knowing that your acceptance of this behavior is contributing to a lifelong investment in your daughter’s bones.
Dr. Debbie
Write your question to Dr. Debbie! Please include age(s) of your child(ren) and other details about the situation or concern.
Deborah Wood, Ph.D. is a child development specialist and founding director of Chesapeake Children’s Museum, located at 25 Silopanna Road in Annapolis.
CCM is open from 10 am to 4 pm daily. Online reservations are available or call: 410-990-1993. Walk-ins are welcome. Art and Story Time with Mrs. Spears and Puppy the Puppet is on Monday mornings at 10:30 am. There is a Nature Walk on Thursdays at 10:30 am.
